A closer look at: Psychological Projection

“We project our own unpleasant feelings onto someone else and blame
them for having thoughts that we really have.”

Put simply, this is somebody telling you, for example

“You’ll never go far”

Or

“That’s a really competitive field. Do you really want to risk it?”

Or

“Are you really going to wear that dress?”

When somebody restricts you or tells you that you can’t do
something, or has such negative opinions of your chances, it is
usually a reflection of them onto you, and should not be taken
as fact. The idea was studied in depth by Sigmund Freud and is a
“defence mechanism in which the individual attributes to other
people impulses and traits that he himself has but cannot accept.
It is especially likely to occur when the person lacks insight into
his own impulses and traits.”

That’s an important point to take note of:

“Especially likely to occur when the person lacks insight into his own
impulses and traits.”

Again it’s a case of, how can anybody, other than yourself, know
what you’re capable of, especially when they probably lack insight
into themselves and their own ability? When somebody dismisses
your chances, don’t take it personally. Think about what they’ve
said with the knowledge that you are the ultimate judge on what
you can and will do. Again, as long as you are being honest with
yourself and are willing to put the work in, I’d trust your own
instincts over critics. Hey, critics and experts have always made
mistakes. As long as you know that and understand that people
are very good at projecting their own fears and failures on to you.
As well as particularly, their own lack of ambition, you’re on track!

Anthony

www.anthony-king.com
www.anthonykingblog.com

Am I an individual? What makes me unique? Do I even have the
ability to answer the question? I think that we all like to think of
ourselves as unique people and we surely hope that we are, but
what’s the fact of the matter? What makes me different from the
next person? The writer Alan Watts points out something very
interesting:

“We seldom realize, for example, that our most private thoughts and
emotions are not actually our own. For we think in terms of languages
and images which we did not invent, but which were given to us by our
society. We copy emotional parents…society is our extended mind and
body”

So, Alan Watts is saying that we copy our emotional responses
from our parents. So is it possible that even that which we claim
to be our inner thoughts and opinions didn’t really originate from us?
Now that’s a thought! If they didn’t originate uniquely
from us and were possibly placed upon us, then what hope
would we have for style, talent or anything else! Let’s take a
look at that though. We are trained beings, we do what our
parents and teachers taught us, turning us into what we are
today. We are bombarded daily with what we need to buy or
think or consume, in order that we may be happy or popular.
We are engulfed with the concepts of what our limitations are
and our “place” in society. The idea that we will never be like
those amazing people “up there” in front of the bright lights
and walking down the red carpets on TV or in the movies and
magazines, constantly. This as though those people are from
another planet, different from the rest of us. That’s just what is
thrust on us from the billboards and advertisements on a walk
down any road, daily. We are being spoken to, literally all the
time through advertising, TV and the media, parents and friends,
colleagues etc.

Does the world influence you? Does it enhance your uniqueness,
buying into somebody else’s idea of beauty, success or morals,
or does it detract from you?

Hmmm…..so when I say to myself “I’ll never be able to dance like
that!” Am I being fair? Am I being honest or am I just repeating what
I think to be correct because I’m not thinking “outside the box”,
but inside the parameters set by other people (which are usually
so limiting)? I would say that it’s based on other people projecting
onto you and you reflecting that back.

The key points to remember are that

• You are the number one expert

• You define your own parameters

• What’s good for everybody else might not and probably
isn’t perfect for you or your set of unique talents and set of
circumstances.

By Anthony King

(Coming next: Acloser look: other people projecting their crap on to you!)

Box A and B are EXACTLY the same colour…full stop!

No….you are wrong…they are! Proof

Obviously this is a one off and just a silly optical illusion…..everything else I know is right though….right?

hhhmmm makes you think………..

Full Link:

http://web.mit.edu/persci/people/adelson/checkershadow_illusion.html

I wish that every young person in the world could see this…

This crossed my mind a couple of weeks back actually, as do lots of things…it just came back into my consciousness right now, and I just wanted to get it out on “paper� quickly.

Its 10.20am on Sunday morning and I’ve just had to make one of those serious phone calls…and the idea of “regrets� has come into my mind. I am very much a person who tries to learn the lessons of life early so that I can at least enjoy life and live it to its maximum, while I am still young…or at least think about the big questions now, while I can still do it and have an effect.

I also have to say that, I do not always agree with other people at all….or the stars or the experts or the poets or the artists…sometimes do, sometimes don’t. I was listening to a Madonna song called “I deserve it�, I like the song a lot and it makes me think. Although there is one thing for me….Everytime she gets to the bridge, I say to myself “no, no, no�…�no way�…..because I personally, would change every thing, and every action, I would work harder and be a better person. I personally think that only a fool, would say that they have “no regrets�….no, I have many regrets…and if I could change them or have acted differently in the situations I have found myself in, I would, and even the positives, if I could change them, I would make them better, have worked harder, expressed myself more passionately, enjoyed the moment more or just appreciated…..appreciated more…..and I’m just a young guy…

Anyway, here it is….just my thoughts on it though…nice song…

I have no regrets

There’s nothing to forget

All the pain was worth it

Madonna “I deserve it” Live